In the secret in a quiet place... I want to Know God more... but I still feel distant... I want to know how to just hear him.. I guess I am always looking for a how or a method or formula to follow in order to get where I need to be. I am sick and tired of just guessing...wondering if that's the spirit talking I hate falling back down to my stupid doubts my desires to be in close communion with Him... to actually feel his presence...
The only time I feel closest to God is when I speaking with Him and my thoughts with my pastor! I can imagine that a whole lot of people feel the same way... you must truly He must truly be a man of prayer; something I am lacking in quality and quantity.
I just seem to not be able to pray... it just feels awkward or something... I pray but it's not habitual(or it is I just don't know what to pray)... I need some guidance on prayer.... that's short and simple of all this... the Bible says his Love is unchanging and he his faithful... but...........................................let's talk about that....
Thanks and sorry for my craziness...I just pray God will be able to mold me into something suitable for His Glory so that I can be there to help someone else out too! I just don't feel good enough to be that for him... or talented enough...how do I know when the spirit is using me... so that I don't flub on someone God is putting in my life and miss an opportunity completely... like taking a course... I feel hindered or held back..is it fear.. I just want to dive in and run....
My impatience getting the best of me I guess....I need to learn how to be still...but I am not wired that way!
1 comment:
"wondering if that's the spirit talking I hate falling back down to my stupid doubts my desires to be in close communion with Him... to actually feel his presence..." (BL4)
If God is everywhere then he can be found anywhere. If you don't pray enough - who is to decide what is enough? Maybe just being you and following those teachings will bring you into closer communion with God (ie: loving your neighbor as much as you love yourself). At least, that is what I have found.
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