Something revealed

I am coming to the realization that I find myself doubting and questioning, only when I find myself apart from what God has been calling me to do!

It seems that once I find myself back in His Path...relating to others...mentoring to others and seeing the Fruit of the Spirit at work that I am all at once at peace and centered!

The Lord continues to reveal his desired teachings to me in His time and I find my questions being answered just hours or pages later! If only I would have patience and faith...

I long to know him more and understand him further! But it is not the understanding that I need! It is the connection that I desire! I know that I need not understand but I must only seek Him! I am here to be in a relationship with him! He is not to be a study guide for me to figure out or a puzzle to solve. It is a life giving, spirit growing Love relationship that I am seeking to discover! That is the word I need to use from now on! DISCOVERY

I seek to discover Him! I long to get to know him more, to be connected with him. I don't need to know how he ticks...I just need to get to know him and feel his presence. What better way then to meet him through his creations! Earth, Animals, Men and Women! Each new experience in life is a new connection, a new discovery to this precious relationship I am in!

a little frustrated, a little impatient, a little I don't know

In the secret in a quiet place... I want to Know God more... but I still feel distant... I want to know how to just hear him.. I guess I am always looking for a how or a method or formula to follow in order to get where I need to be. I am sick and tired of just guessing...wondering if that's the spirit talking I hate falling back down to my stupid doubts my desires to be in close communion with Him... to actually feel his presence...

The only time I feel closest to God is when I speaking with Him and my thoughts with my pastor! I can imagine that a whole lot of people feel the same way... you must truly He must truly be a man of prayer; something I am lacking in quality and quantity.

I just seem to not be able to pray... it just feels awkward or something... I pray but it's not habitual(or it is I just don't know what to pray)... I need some guidance on prayer.... that's short and simple of all this... the Bible says his Love is unchanging and he his faithful... but...........................................let's talk about that....

Thanks and sorry for my craziness...I just pray God will be able to mold me into something suitable for His Glory so that I can be there to help someone else out too! I just don't feel good enough to be that for him... or talented enough...how do I know when the spirit is using me... so that I don't flub on someone God is putting in my life and miss an opportunity completely... like taking a course... I feel hindered or held back..is it fear.. I just want to dive in and run....

My impatience getting the best of me I guess....I need to learn how to be still...but I am not wired that way!